When I became a Mum 5 years ago. I lost myself. I worked out eventually how to be a Mum, enough to do it a second time and once I went back to work I remembered how to be the working me. But honestly I have realised I didn’t actually know how to be the me-with-kids.
It was easy to ignore working full time the last few years, I didn’t really have the time or energy to be anything else but working-me and mum-me but recently working from home and part time. I have started to think again.
Mum-me does the PTA , sorts out playgroup ,makes sure my kids are growing and healthy and increasingly read and do their spellings. Work-me is mostly organised delivers and sometimes pulls an all-nighter due to a combination of insomnia and foolhardiness.
But I totally forgot about the external things that I want. I know in the last 5 years it has been almost impossible to get the one essential my introverted-self needs , an hour or two a day alone reading a book (it has often happened at 3am). So anything more seems like indulgence.
And oddly I realised this morning at Issy’s playgroup one thing I really miss. I had just spent 20 minutes extolling the virtues of a pressure cooker to someone when a lovely Mum, who runs Korean Cookery courses offered me some of her homemade Kimchi.
It was a lightbulb I love to cook and this lovely blog let me share it with other people and gave me so much pleasure. And it was really me-me….. So to hell with it blogs are old school we are all v-log and it’s really all about clean eating.
For the first time in ages tonight I got out my camera took a picture of my food before I are it and have spent 20 minutes writing nonsense about my own dinner. And that’s me , that’s what I do
So here , kimchi from the lovely Inkyung ( I’ll get the recipe soon…. it was much less salty than mine) . I served it with some pressure cooker pulled pork …. out the freezer and some beansprouts. It was delicious and writing this was pretty lovely too.